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| 1. Make a list of people you have to agree with—for whatever reason, be they your boss, better half, parent, child or pet. Now cross off the ones you are free to say no to without getting into a fight, fired, or made to feel bad about.
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In fact it means just the opposite: having the freedom to feel whatever we feel, whether that meets with someone else's approval or not. No longer having to hide or defend against pressure from people wanting something from us comes from an ability to say no. What I am here to tell you is that being nice is an aberration of the natural order when it comes to having a healthy personality,cheap michael kors, according to studies of the human developmental process. Compliance is a poor substitute for commitment because it lacks connection to the core of our being; but most of all it bypasses a most important step in the process of saying yes—that of exercising our will. Making a decision based on our principles, values, likes,hogan, dislikes, etc. requires a decision making process that many of our friends and loved ones don't want us to utilize. Conversely, we want them to be nice by giving in to our requests,hollister, requirements, demands, and tirades when absolutely necessary. We want to be able to make them feel whatever is required that will motivate them to do our agenda. We are trained from very young to be nice. Most mommies hate it when their precious little tykes screw up their faces and angrily say no! Daddies are more likely to use force to quash defiance and enforce obedience to rules,barbour sale, out of respect if no other reason. After all,hollister france, it can be terribly embarrassing when the odd child in the bunch gets all rebellious and the parents are called out by baby sitter, the school teacher, or police officer to answer for it. Children are supposed to be well behaved, which does not include having a mind of their own, especially when their mind includes being defiant. Compliance is selected for and becomes an important component in the social survival of the fittest. And this is especially true of girl children, while boys are allowed to be more independent, which includes being less nice on occasion. By Gary Robertson See all Articles by Gary RobertsonSee Gary Robertson's Expert PageGet Updates on Assertiveness TrainingGet Updates on Gary Robertson Average: 2.8 Your rating: None Average: 2.8 (5 votes) Tweet What does saying yes have to do with saying no? After all, they are opposite statements,air jordan, meaning diametrically opposing things. We are “supposed” to say yes to friends, family, loved ones and especially...the Universe! Isn't that the secret behind the Secret? And we should say no to things like drugs, smoking and requests from our teenagers begging to go to wild parties. Think about the people you know (if that includes you, so much the better) whose word is good, no matter what. When they say they will do something,nike air jordan, you can count on it getting done. Can they also say no when they have to? When your request is out of line with their integrity, are they willing to stand up to you and refuse? If you cannot make them agree with you or comply with what you want, odds are you can count on them to do and say and be what they agree to. And the degree to which they truly own their actions certainly matches the chances they will come through for you when really needed, without you having to enforce or encourage them along the way. Being able to make commitments that have no need for outside coaching, encouragement, or motivational technique to maintain are rest on a foundation saying yes to ourselves before saying yes to any person or circumstance outside us. They rely on the horses of interest, desire, and willingness to carry us forward, not the whips of shame,louboutin, guilt and perceived needs of those outside us. We need to respect our selves by allowing the decisional process to happen, without allowing the shoulds and shouldn'ts of others to decide for us. Author's Bio: Which brings us around again to saying yes. If we cannot take a stand when we need to by saying no, then when we say yes, it has the same fragile quality. There is no firm commitment when we say yes out of obligation. Or because we would feel bad if we refused. And when our best friend really has to have a favor, can we refuse? Bottom line, if anyone can make us do or say or feel something that isn't genuinely us, then someone else or some other circumstance can change it. Respecting the same for others consists of allowing and waiting for a response, rather than attempting to make decisions for them. Doing so may encourage others to respect our own yesses and nos, but may not be reciprocated. Simply paying attention to who listens to us when we make definitive statements about what we will commit to and what we won't gives clear indication of who we can count on, as well. For many of us, the simple criterion of listening and respecting our decisions becomes a qualifier or disqualifier of whom we will be real friends—and more. How many grown up people around you can really say no? And mean it. Can you? How popular is that? Aren't we supposed to be emotionally open to friends and loved ones. Shouldn't we give them access to our feelings and let them change our minds about something when they really, really want something from us? A majority of the population would have to agree with that, if the truth be told. We can go on and on with diagnostic questions, but the point is if your lists are lengthy, there is room for improvement in your abilities to say yes and no. What can be considered optimal would be for us to feel free to decide for ourselves, based on our personal likes and dislikes, values, and feeling about the situation. And make a decision every time we get asked, using whatever criteria suit us at the moment. Want to know how good you are at saying yes,michael kors outlet? Take this simple test: take a sheet of paper for each of these questions and write large enough for someone else to read your answers. Why are most of us so wishy-washy when it comes to making commitments? Just look at the divorce rate as an example. More than half of the couples making the most important commitment of their lives will change their minds later. What they said an unequivocal yes to at one time, they say no to later on. We all feel betrayed at one time or another by friends breaking their solemn word and we all know someone we cannot trust to keep their promises. Maybe that betrayer, that someone who doesn't walk their talk is the face looking back at us in the mirror when we brush our teeth in the morning. Well, I'm here to tell you that we all have to be able to say no before our yeses have real meaning. What I am talking about has to do with having that solid something inside us that goes beyond wanting and wishing. It means having an immutable core that cannot be accessed from outside by anyone—not even our mommy or daddy or dearest loved ones. Not even our sweet babe cuddled in our arms. 相关的主题文章： all has the advantage in the market why not consider medical billing in the earth's gravitational influence The local police initially identified, the explosion is caused by the hot pot shop liquefied gas leak, the cause is in the further investigation, the authorities have launched an on-site cleanup. |
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| Reaction to Tuesday morning's events on the West Sea is varied,abercrombie france. Labor
unions have as of recent been quite verbal because of last week's allegations that the State Prosecution helped to incite a strike last year,abercrombie soldes. The Korean Confederation of Trade Unions and the Federation of Korean of Trade Unions are both scaling down strikes they had been scheduling since last week,barbour sale. Citizens groups issued statements urging a variety of actions on the part of the government,hollister, with many questioning whether or not Mount Kumgang tourism should be either completely rethought or stopped altogether,www.francemagasin.fr. A tour boat left from Tonghae Tuesday morning to become one of two currently in North Korean waters,hogan, causing friends and relatives to call Hyundai out or concern for those on the tours,louboutin. Most people appeared unfazed by the incident and life in Seoul carried on as normal,barbour sale. Residents of Yeonpyeong Island reacted as if war had broken out,louboutin pas cher, and indeed for them it had,hollister france. Alerted first by the sound of gunfire that many say clearly did no resemble a training mission, many called family on the mainland or gathered around for news of whether any fishing vessels from the island had become subject to any of the day's violence,louboutin pas cher. (Seo Banseok,louboutin, seobs@chosun.com) 相关的主题文章: Kang Kyung-hi is tantamount to fraud Before Chosing a Web Hosting provider Japanese news media reported Friday that Korea's five largest business conglomerates, Hyundai, Samsung, Daewoo, LG and SK, all plan to increase their paid-in capital by more than W15 trillion in total this year. |
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| Wysłany: Pią 17:00, 09 Sie 2013 Temat postu: |
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| People wait to enter the newest Apple store in Grand Central Station in New York City on Friday,hollister.
Two months since the death of Apple CEO Steve Jobs, the firm's management is showing signs of wobbling. The market shares of the iPhone and iPad are declining, and a series of patent-infringement lawsuits against rivals are not entirely going to plan. Apple's competitors,barbour jackets, who were caught on the back foot by the iPhone and iPad, are rapidly releasing products aimed at toppling the leader. ◆ Shrinking Demand U.S. market research firm Canaccord Genuity recently said Apple's share of the American table PC market is forecast to fell from 74 percent in the third quarter to 53.2 percent in the fourth, with the decisive blow being dealt by Amazon's cheap Kindle Fire, which costs just US$199. The Kindle Fire is likely to grab some 20 percent of the market in only 1.5 month since its release on Oct. 15, on the back of the low price and access to Amazon's huge content. The iPhone 4S, the last product overseen by Jobs,barbour sale, is also losing its appeal. Some dealers in Korea have already slashed prices by W100,louboutin,000 (US$1=W1,146) since the product was launched in early November. The phone is also subject to complaints about the short battery life and static and disrupted signal during phone calls. But the main reason is probably that consumers are waiting for the release of the all-new iPhone5 later next year,hollister france, since the 4S was merely an upgrade of the 4. KT and SK Telecom,hollister, which market the iPhone 4S in Korea,air jordan pas cher, have been caught off guard by lackluster demand,louboutin pas cher, since Apple apparently asked dealers to buy a batch of at least 500,000 units. SK is said to be having trouble selling out the initial batch. And because of the popularity of fourth-generation LTE protocol, SK is focusing more on selling LTE phones than the 3G iPhone 4S. So far KT and SK have sold only a combined 300,000 units. An SK Telecom official said the gadget "has become a headache." ◆ Rivals Going on Offensive A court in Mannheim, Germany ruled Friday that Apple infringed Motorola's third-generation mobile communications standards and banned the sale of the iPhone and iPad. That could increase the chances of Samsung Electronics,hollister france, which has also filed a patent suit against Apple in the same town. PC makers, which were badly hurt by the popularity of the iPhone and iPad, have also gone on the offensive, releasing so-called "ultrabooks,hollister france," an industry standard for the next generation of laptops recently unveiled by Intel. Ultrabooks are half as thick and weigh half as much as existing laptops, and it takes just a third of the time to boot them. But analysts say Apple's heyday is not over yet because it still boasts strong software and content. The app store,louboutin, which opened in July of 2008, saw 10 billion accumulated downloads as of January of this year and reached 18 billion 10 months later,scarpe hogan, showing how much clout the company still wields among consumers. 相关的主题文章： taking 13th with $8 billion. In 2004 yesterday morning in April 23rd As expected, "Les Misérables" -- the film adaptation of Victor Hugo's 19th century novel -- was the winner of the Globes best comedy or musical category, and its stars Hugh Jackman and Anne Hathaway won acting honors. |
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